Dumb Reviews
by Disneefreek
Summary: Hester B. Dumb reviews fanfics! HOORAY!
1. Hank the Cowdog and the Holy Grail

And now it's time for Dumb Reviews, with Hester B. Dumb.

Tonight's review:

Orange Ratchet's _Hank the Cowdog and the Holy Grail_

* * *

"OMG, THIS IS THE GREATEST FANFIC I'VE EVER READ IN MY LIFE!

(singing to "The Song That Goes Like This") This is the review that has spoilers!

There's this cowdog named Hank.

And he's the King of the land!

So, he and his friends are riding along and they meet this cat named Bucky.

And they're like "He's dead!"

And Bucky's like "No, I'm not!"

And they're like "Yes, you are!"

And Bucky's like "No, I'm not!"

So, then, they meet up with the Collie of the Lake and some guy named Snoopy!

And the Collie's like "Hey Snoopy, wanna be a knight?"

"Sure!"

And then, they go to this village where they burn witches!

**I** used to burn witches once!

When I played World of Warcraft.

And the witch they're burning is like "I don't wanna be burned!"

And the townsfolk are like "Too bad!"

But then, they save the witch!

HOORAY!

And then, the Collie comes up and gives them a quest to find the Holy Grail!

I used to find grails once!

When I was high.

So then, we hear the tales of Scooby-Doo and Snoopy.

They're not that good.

So then, Hank and his knights then do something about spam.

I did spam once!

Man, that was a great summer.

Then, they face the dreaded Monkeys who Say Ni!

And the monkeys are like "Ni! (imitates monkey from Family Guy)"

And the knights are like "What do you want from us?"

And the monkeys are like "Get us a diet soda! Ni! (imitates monkey from Family Guy)"

So then, the narrator randomly comes in and tells the tale of Sora.

The tale features a girl named Cinderella, and she's like

"I just wanna sing!"

And her bitchy mother is like "No!"

And Cinderella's like "Okay."

But then, Sora comes in and he's like "I'll save you!"

And he saves Cinderella from that bitchy mother!

HOORAY!

And later on, everyone reunites!

(unenthusiastically) Hooray...

Then, they come across the Bridge of Death.

I used to have a Bridge of Death once!

And they have to answer three questions to get across!

It works out pretty well.

And then, they get lost again!

And Hank's like "I'm alone..."

And the knights are like "No, you're not. You're here with us, but we'll join you in singing a song about how lonely you are."

WHAT?

So anyways, they come across the Holy Grail, and there's a big fat huge wedding!

HOORAY!

So, "Hank the Cowdog and the Holy Grail" was a wonderful, wonderful, fic.

But come on! You can't be alone if there are people with you!

This is Hester B. Dumb saying "MONEY! YA GOT MONEY! OH, COME ON, MONEY! I'LL USE IT TO BUY MY OWN HOLY GRAIL!"

* * *

_Seriously though, "Hank the Cowdog and the Holy Grail" was pretty dang good._


	2. The Ash Ketchum Fanfiction

And now it's time for Dumb Reviews, with Hester B. Dumb.

Tonight's review:

_"The Ash Ketchum Fanfiction" by Orange Ratchet_

* * *

"OH MY GOD, THIS IS THE GREATEST FANFIC I'VE EVER READ IN MY LIFE!

(sings) Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SPOILERS!

There's this kid named Ash.

And wherever he lives, it's the opening of Burger McDucks 2!

HOORAY!

And Ash is like "I am SO gonna be manager!"

Meanwhile, this baby named Stewie is like

"It's not fair! I'm never gonna get the secret recipe now!"

And his friend Brian's like, "You've still got one more plan left."

And Stewie's like "I do?"

And Brian's like "Yeah."

And Stewie reads the plan and he's like "I love this plan! I'm gonna use it!"

Meanwhile, back at the Burger McDuck 2 thing, Ash is like

"I am SO gonna be manager!"

But then Scrooge McDuck, Ash's boss, is like "The new manager will be...the Rabbit!"

And Ash is like "YAY! Wait, WHAT?"

And Scrooge is like "Rabbit is more mature than you, so that's why I gave him the job."

And then, Stewie goes to steal the recipe.

And how?

By stealing the crown of Prince John!

**I** used to steal crowns once!

So then, Prince John is like "Scrooge McDuck, you stole my crown!"

And Scrooge is like "No I didn't!"

And John is like "Yes, you did! And you gave it to a guy who sold it to a guy at the Rainforest Co-fay!"

**I** used to live at the Rainforest Co-fay once!

But management kicked me out.

So then, Ash butts in and he's like

(imitating a drunk guy) "I say punish him, because he wouldn't let me be manager!"

And John's like "Okay."

Then, his friend Tony butts in, and says "Wait, if we get your crown, will you not punish Mr. Scrooge?"

And John's like "Okay, but I'll have the freeze the duck."

And Scrooge's like "Awesome! Wait, WHAT?"

(Hester pretends to freeze someone)

So Ash, Tony and his dumb sister, Sarah, go out to find the crown.

Meanwhile, Stewie's like "You're frozen, so I'm just gonna take your formula!"

And why is he doing this? So he can take over the world!

(as M. Bison) OF COURSE!

And the townspeople are like "All hail Stewie, all hail Stewie..."

Meanwhile, a bunch of stuff happens, and the gang finds themselves on a table with a heating lamp over them!

And where is it?

Rainforest Co-fay!

HOORAY!

But then, the threesome dies.

Haroo...

But then, they come back to life!

HOORAY!

So then, they come back home, bring back the crown, and free everyone from Stewie with the POWER OF ROCK!

(Hester headbands to Ash's "Goosey Gander Rock")

And Stewie is put in jail, and Ash is made manager!

HOORAY!

So, this story was amazing!

This is Hester B. Dumb saying "MONEY! YA GOT MONEY? I NEED IT TO PAY OFF SOME GUY WHOSE CROWN I STOLE! MONEY!"

* * *

_Seriously through, "The Ash Ketchum Fanfiction" was decent, but ya gotta love scenes with near-nude chicks, ice cream, and the POWER OF ROCK!_


End file.
